Life with Theme Park Mice: The Chair

I stand at the bottom of a paved hill, in the middle of Disney's doomed Pleasure Island, and begin to doubt my strength. Pleasure Island used to be filled with dance clubs and bars before they were all shuttered, and I wonder how any drunk person managed this incline without tumbling down it. My recently injured wife is in a wheelchair, and I must push her up this hill. There are other paths, but none this direct or quick.

Suddenly, I notice a wheelchair next to ours. There's a teenage girl, most likely also with a broken leg, sitting in it. She smiles at my wife, who smiles back to her. It seems like a pleasant enough scene, but I know the real truth. This is now a race, and I will reach the top of the hill first.

Hunching down, I begin to push with all of my strength. My wife isn't heavy, but this steep grade is punishing even without a wheelchair. The Florida humidity clings to my flesh as the sun sears my face. I almost begin to run, pushing and pushing while trying not to lose my grip.

? Pounds to Disneyland: The Hiatus

Not a wheelchair, but it is a giant wheel.

  The continuing tales of one chunky Disney fan's personal quest to lose 80 pounds and visit Disneyland, in that order.  

See my first 80 Pounds to Disneyland post for all the details.

 Previous Post: 39 Pounds to Disneyland: Halfway There

Next Post: ? Pounds to Disneyland?: Changes

In my last update, I had finally hit the halfway point to my goal. I celebrated. I was ecstatic. I thought nothing would get in the way of my goal.

Hubris, my friends, makes fools of us all.

First, life brought even more chaos, with my amazing wife Nicole receiving excessive hours at work, while I tried to juggle freelance work, my continuing job search, and keeping the house from filling with garbage and dirty dishes and catching on fire. Weight loss slowed to a crawl, but I still made half-hearted attempts to keep working towards my goal.

Unfortunately, fate decided Nicole needed to take a break from her exhausting schedule by breaking her ankle. She both shared my weight loss goal and the recent backslide into bad habits. Now, progress towards her goal is completely stalled until her ankle heals.

As a show of solidarity, I've decided to temporarily put my weight loss goal on hold until we can both progress together. I'm going to stay active and eat healthier, but I won't be actively weighing myself or planning our trip to Disneyland.

At the very least, I'll be getting some extra exercise. Pushing a wheelchair around amusement parks has given me the realization that I have way too little upper body strength.

Life with Theme Park Mice: A Halo of Bubbles

 

"I'm not here to have fun." This thought passes through my head as I pull into the parking space, far away from my destination. I feel a moment of relief, having made it through the madness of Interntional Drive traffic once again. It's a gauntlet of distracted vacationers walking into traffic, drivers from the middle of nowhere dealing with congestion for the first time, and buses making continual stops along the strip of tourist traps.

My relief vanishes when I remember what's next. I check for car keys multiple times, delaying the inevitable. Finally, slowly, I take a deep breath and climb out of the car into the humid Florida air. The heat makes my head reel for a moment, but what keeps it spinning is the sight before me. I gaze upon the massive outlet mall and its shopping masses, and I wonder how I'm going to get through to my destination.

As I make my way through the parking lot, my body instinctively changes stance, taking on the form of a football player ready to crash through his opposition. My glasses slide down my nose, but I let them hang just a few centimeters from falling. Seeing everything as a blur only helps me deal with navigating the crowds.

Magic Kingdom Update: May 28th, 2013

Memorial day has come and gone, but it seems the crowds are sticking around longer than expected. Summer is essentially here in Florida, so tourist season might as well start early as well. In addition, summer weather is here, with 90 degree temperatures every day and random storms every afternoon. Watch those clouds behind the castle, you're going to see a lot more of them in this update.

Before we get to wiggy weather, first we must take the customary monorail ride to the park. Along the way, the Grand Floridian continues rapid construction on the new DVC wing. File this under another grand hotel that I won't be experiencing unless I win the lottery or get some very rich friends.

 

Something I'm more likely to utilize one day are the new bus loops to expand the Disney transportation system. While it looks like a giant dirt pit right now, I have a feeling a new paved area will take less time to complete than a hotel expansion or mine train.

Downtown Disney Update: May 10th, 2013

 

Recently, Disney announced the transformation of Downtown Disney into Disney Springs, a major expansion and of the existing shopping and dining district. Unlike some previous attempts to revitalize the area, progress is already visible. The entire project is supposed to take several years to complete.

A large section of Pleasure Island is already behind construction walls, blocking off one of the areas used for seating and outdoor performances. Pleasure Island has been mostly dormant since its clubs closed, so most of it is going to be demolished.

Unfortunately, the construction walls only feature outdated promotional materials for Downtown Disney, instead of concept art for Disney Srings. Hopefully that will change soon.

Tourist Parenting 101: Ducks Shouldn't Eat Rice

 

Last year I posted a couple articles recounting terrible tales of bad parenting at Theme Parks. While I continue to find many negative examples to share, I also see parents giving their kids some magical moments the right way. This is one of those stories.

Lesson 3- Let Your Children Play with the Ducks (Not Kick Them)

I've mentioned before, and I'm sure I'll mention many more times, that Disney World is often an unexpected haven for nature. Many animals, especially birds, that are less frightened of humans find the theme parks a great place to rest, raise their young, and steal some french fries. You can spot a wide array of unsuspecting visitors if you walk the parks slowly. Spotting a group of rabbits or some ducklings can often be as magic a moment as meeting a favorite character or watching a show.

Unfortunately, most tourists visit the parks with an "all or nothing" mentality. Every attraction must be visited, every moment must be filled with manufactured wonder, or the entire trip is a waste. These are the same people, and specifically parents, who visit Animal Kingdom, rush their children away from the animals that fascinate them, then bemoan that the park has "nothing to do." When the children do get a brief moment to explore, they expel pent up energy in destructive ways, like kicking at the wildlife or trying to destroy theming.

Busch Gardens Tampa Update: May 6th 2013

 

Some weeks, my wife and I just need to get away. Life gets too stressful, and we can't deal with the crowds typically found in the Orlando theme parks. One of the cures for those days is Busch Gardens Tampa. The crowds are low during the week, the animal collection is stellar, and there's a great collection of rides.  Well, we've never ridden anything more intense than the train, but the rides are nice to watch at least. The top reason it's our therapeutic getaway, however, is that you can pet the kangaroos.

Before you get to the kangaroos, however, you have to past lots and lots of advertising for the new "Madagascar Live! Operation: Vacation" show. The park's major addition for the year, it's featured at the parking tram shelter,

And throughout the park, including the entrance.

 

The new show has only about a week until opening, but work is still finishing up on the Stanleyville Theater.