40 Pounds to Disneyland: The Vinylmation Trading Dash

 

The continuing tales of one chunky Disney fan's personal quest to lose 80 pounds and visit Disneyland, in that order.  

See my first 80 Pounds to Disneyland post for all the details.

Previous Post: 41 Pounds to Disneyland: It Could Have Been Worse

There are days where you wake up and have an idea so amazing, you know you have to try it immediately. Something that achieves multiple goals at once, and gives you an excuse to go to Disney World. I woke up this particular morning envisioning a way to exercise, get coverage for my writing on Vinylmation World, and hopefully wear myself out enough to sleep better than I had in days.

I was going to try something new, the Vinylmation Trading Dash. For those who don't understand the strange world of Vinylmation, the plastic figures are often sold in blind boxes, making it mostly random chance what figure you receive. To alleviate some of this randomness, Disney has provided one to two locations at each theme park where you can trade for either one of a few visible figures, or take a couple chances trading from a mystery box. This mostly results in receiving Vinylmation being clearanced at the outlet stores, but occasionally there's a hidden gem or two inside.

The Misanthrope's Guide to Disney World: The Best Parks for Avoiding People

Part of the Misanthrope's Guide to Disney World, a series of posts on surviving the theme parks for people who hate people. The guide page can be found here.

All Disney World theme parks are not created equal. They were all formed under different circumstances, shaped with different goals, and have received varying levels of care and neglect over the years. Most rankings of the four theme parks focus on aspects like the amount of rides offered, the number of attractions that qualify as "E-Tickets" (world famous rides, essentially), or just generally how busy you can remain.

These qualifications are generally useless for my purposes. From a misanthrope's point of view, more attractions designed to attract the masses is a negative. For our purposes, the most important factor is how easy is it to enjoy and explore a theme park while also being able to escape from other people. When the tourists, tour groups, and terrors grow to strong, there has to be somewhere to find peace, quiet, and harmony. At the very least, whatever passes for peace, quiet, and harmony in Disney World. Here are the theme parks ranked from best to worst for avoiding people.

The Misanthrope's Guide to Disney World

Fourth of July at Magic Kingdom

Part of the Misanthrope's Guide to Disney World, a series of posts on surviving the theme parks for people who hate people. The guide page can be found here.

  "Court and town furnish me with nothing but occasions to stoke my fury. It fills me with black depression and reduces me to utter despair to see men living as they do. I meet with nothing but base flattery, injustice, selfishness, treachery, villainy everywhere. I can't stand it any more. It infuriates me."- Alceste in Moliere's The Misanthrope

"The only people who can be excused for unleashing a bad book on the world are the poor devils who have to write for a living."- Alceste again

There's an odd divide that seems to exist within adult fans of the Disney company, and specifically those that attend the Walt Disney World theme parks. On one side are the eternal optimists, excited for any aspect of the world of Disney, always ready to embrace the new and unworried about the little problems. The other side are the pessimists, who don't see little problems, but glaring, growing flaws and issues that will consume the entire company and its magic.

Guides to Disney World often feel like they are addressing either of these sides. Some of these books, especially the official guides, seem to function only to tell you what's more amazing than everything else that is just somewhat amazing. Other guide books operate the other end of the spectrum, in a cynical universe where the theme park experience is a gauntlet to be endured, less a vacation and more a death march with lots of costumed characters along the way.

Videogameopolis: The Wolf Among Us

One of last year's video games of the year was an incredible tale of morality and consequences in a harsh, Hobbesian state of nature. Regrettably, I never played this game, even though it's primary gameplay was dialogue and choices, not gunplay or violence. That game is The Walking Dead, Telltale Games original story set within the greater Walking Dead fiction. I utterly detest anything with more than the lightest bits of horror, and zombies just exhaust me. I still felt like I was missing a minor cultural event, however, when the otherwise action obsessed mainstream gaming culture embraced something that encouraged thoughts, emotion, and analysis.

Last week, Telltale released the first chapter of its newest serialized game, The Wolf Among Us, titled "Hope". This game shares similar mechanics to The Walking Dead, and is also based on a cult comic book series. However, the settings and plot of both series are miles apart.

41 Pounds to Disneyland: It Could Have Been Worse

The continuing tales of one chunky Disney fan's personal quest to lose 80 pounds and visit Disneyland, in that order.  

See my first 80 Pounds to Disneyland post for all the details.

Previous Post: ? Pounds to Disneyland?: Changes

Next Post: 40 Pounds to Disneyland: The Vinylmation Trading Dash

This week is the first week that my wife and I have returned to decent eating habits and exercise. This is also one of the worst times of the year to return to healthy eating, as the annual Epcot Food and Wine Festival is ongoing. We've already indulged of it once, but I haven't completed my annual sampling of all the cheese platters available. I may have to starve myself for a week to compensate, but I will not be denied gourmet cheeses that would drive most people away with their scent alone.

Otherwise, getting back in to healthy eating isn't quite as intolerable as I feared. For one thing, it's been long enough that I no longer fear the site of Lean Cuisine boxes and have no more nightmares of salads consuming me. The reduced portions are proving problematic, but stomach shrinkage comes naturally over time. I have hope that this time I will make it to my goal.

Videogameopolis: I Don't Want to Fight Those Monsters

 

Recently I finished playing two blockbuster video games, Assassin's Creed III and Skyrim, but I didn't actually complete them. Since these are modern AAA games, they were filled with excessive amounts of extra, often pointless, content, but I'm not referring to those parts of these games. I never reached the end of these games, did not see the end credits roll, and I don't have an immense desire to finish them. I was tired of fighting monsters, both literal and metaphorical, and had discovered a lot more about my own personality in the process.

In Skyrim, you play as an adventurer of self-determined origins who discovers he/she is Dragonborn, a unique form of warrior able to slay and absorb the souls of dragons. The main plot is rather thin, as it can essentially be summed up as kill dragons, find out who is bring back the dragons, and eliminate them as well. It's mostly an excuse to explore and interact with a huge fantasy world, buildling your own story along the way.

Exploring dark tombs and ancient ruins, my created character faced undead abominations, malfunctioning mechanical wonders, and a virtual legion of bandits and thieves of various sorts. It was interesting at first, but soon I found myself bored with bashing zombies with a large, blunt weapon. I focused on the game's minor content, building up a home of my own, adopting an orphan, then finally marrying a fellow adventurer. Instead of stealing from untouched ruins or disturbing otherwise isolated creatures, I was creating a better life for my character.

Quick Review: Gatorland

For over 6 decades, Gatorland has existed outside the mainstream of Orlando tourism. Hidden on the outskirts of Orlando only recently touched by suburban development, it's a destination separated from the bigger attractions both by distance and ideology. Gatorland is a family owned attraction with an almost singular purpose, presenting visitors with an extreme concentration of some of the world's biggest reptiles. From the iconic giant jaws in front to the breeding swamps in the back, everything is devoted to alligators.